Ever wonder why you do the things you do? Probably about half who read this will say yes, they do wonder what the motivations are behind their actions. The second half will say no, they don't wonder such things because, in their mind, the answer is obvious. But is it? You are reading these words on the screen right now. Why? The second half may say "Because I want to", or any number of other causal factors. But ask yourself this; WHY do you want to? And whatever answer you arrive at, ask yourself WHY once again. Keep doing this long enough, and eventually you'll reach a point where you do not have an answer readily available, but also you finally become AWARE that you DON'T KNOW.
Not knowing is the key that opens the door to enlightenment. We are taught certain things growing up. These things are taught to us by people we trust. Our parents. Our teachers. Our movies. Our TV. And so, by the time we reach our twenties, most of us think we have what matters all figured out. Our trusted sources have laid the blueprint down for a happy life, it's just up to us to follow it. If failure happens along the way, it's our fault, of course! We just didn't try "hard enough" or left the path for some reason. It never occurs to most, that the reason they fail, is because they are on the WRONG PATH. What? A wrong path? How can that be? We are clearly taught there is ONE path, and it's the path for EVERYONE. The path of doing good in school, making friends, following the advice of your elders, going to college, getting married, finding a career in a field that makes a ton of money, buying a nice house, having kids, getting old, and finally death. The tedium of this life is to be broken up by television, video games, sex, sports, and the drama of real life (ie politics, religion, family).
What I have discovered, is that there are many paths, perhaps infinite paths, and you do not have to follow the one that is put before you. In fact, rarely is that path the one for you. Usually, the path put before you is there because of someone else. They want you on that path, for reasons that could be good or not. So, it is important, once you are cognitively able, to question the path before you. If you are already on that path, question it anyway. I know starting over may seem impossible, a daunting task. But question it you must, for another, more fulfilling path may be out there, just waiting for you to claim it. So what is it that keeps us from claiming the path meant for us? There are many things, but this blog entry is going to focus on one; Sensation Seeking.
While I do not consider myself a Buddhist (not even Buddha was), I have to give credit where credit is due. The idea of "sensation seeking" and that it hinders personal growth and insight came from studying Buddhism. I looked at my life, both past and present. I analyzed the memories to see if the concept of sensation seeking was bull, or if there was some truth to it. I was shocked at what I found. Almost all of the things we do that hinder spiritual/mental growth comes seeking sensation. So what is it, exactly?
Sensation seeking is when we do something, or avoid something, implicitly for the reason of attaining a certain sensation, or avoiding one. The goal of all sensation seeking is pleasure. To "feel good" seems to be equated with "happiness". In America, "the pursuit of happiness" has been etched into our brains since birth. But what if the happiness we are taught to seek after, isn't true happiness? While we aren't taught it verbally, we DO learn that feeling good = happiness. Feeling good begins to seem like being hooked on drugs. We like how "feeling good" feels. Obviously. So we seek it, more and more. We are judged by HOW we seek to feel good. If the majority of people do a certain thing to feel good, they are cheered as normal. If someone does a thing to feel good that most people do NOT do, he/she is ostracized and judged by the masses. Our entire culture is built around the pursuit of happiness, which more and more seems to be the pursuit of feeling good.
We see a car. If looking at that car makes us "feel good" we buy it, if we can afford it. If we can't, we feel bad inside that we haven't lived a life that enables us to buy that car. But almost at the same time, we justify not needing that car, so the bad feeling is drowned out by the propaganda of our mind and it's desire to not be conscious of bad things. Denial. The same goes with clothes, food, homes, etc.... Almost any and everything you buy, regardless of the justifications you used to attain them, or the reasoning you use when you have to settle for things that make you feel "less good", are ultimately how they make you FEEL. So you begin to live a life of sensation seeking, like a drug addict looking for his next fix. Taste, Touch, Sight, Hearing, Smell and Mind are all your senses, and by the time you are an adult, these senses are using you, instead of you using them. For those that think the mind is not another sense, ask yourself this; when a person is looking toward the future or past, and relishes in the prospect of power and control, which sense gives him that information that makes him feel so good? It is mind, of course. The mind takes the input of the first 5 senses, and combines them all in a way that gives a greater understanding of pleasure than one sense alone could ever give. It also does the same for displeasure, usually referred to as Pain. So our lives are lived in constant pursuit of pleasure and in constant fear of pain. These primal urges work like background processes in a computer, affecting all you do without your conscious mind ever noticing. However, under careful scrutiny, these hidden processes can be revealed. And being conscious of these things, with the understanding that they are bad for you and should be altered, will begin to alter all by themselves.... So many people do not try to change, because they think it would be too hard. And if you "try" to change, it IS hard. So don't try. Just be aware. Make an effort to be aware. That is all. "Know Thy Self"
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